silenthill:

i hate porn. “ohh fuck my ass!!!” you fuck your own damn ass

ur bumper sticker says friendly but ur aggressive driving and confederate flag hanging out the back of ur car are telling me otherwise

sniffing:

do u ever accidentally slam the door on your parents after an argument and then have to sit there praying to god to help u through the ensuing shit storm that you know is about to go down

vagisodium:

he sank the boat he was working on just to kill the captain

vagisodium:

he sank the boat he was working on just to kill the captain

broken-gaydar:

starrygraveyard:

andr3wdost:

nathanieljosephruess:

herfunnyvideos:

lockedinabirdcage:

GUYS I JUST REALIZED WHY PAPER BEATS ROCK OH MY GOD

PAPER SYMBOLIZES WORDS WHICH SYMBOLIZES BRAINS

AND ROCK SYMBOLIZES BRAWN.

BRAINS OVER BRAWN.

MIND OVER MATTER.

PAPER OVER ROCK.

You clever little shit.

then what the fuck does scissors mean

lesbians

what

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dogapult:

are we just gonna not talk about soulless black-eyed family emoji

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orgyporgy:

as soon as i heard her line “pussy put his ass to sleep now he callin me NyQuil” i knew i was listening to Art

unclefather:

you want a man with a strong jawline so you have a sturdy place to sit